21.256 neologisms

               Humanist Discussion Group, Vol. 21, No. 256.
       Centre for Computing in the Humanities, King's College London
  www.kcl.ac.uk/schools/humanities/cch/research/publications/humanist.html
                        www.princeton.edu/humanist/
                     Submit to: humanist_at_princeton.edu

         Date: Wed, 19 Sep 2007 06:56:55 +0100
         From: Willard McCarty <willard.mccarty_at_kcl.ac.uk>
         Subject: Washington Post Neologisms

None of the following has anything whatever to do with computing, in
the humanities or anywhere else, but it will delight those who love words.

Yours,
WM

>From: "Hugh Denard" <Hugh.Denard_at_kcl.ac.uk>
>To: "'Willard McCarty'" <willard.mccarty_at_kcl.ac.uk>
>>Date: Tue, 18 Sep 2007 13:02:27 +0100
>
>
>Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its
>yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate
>meanings for common words. The winners are:
>
>1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
>
>2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have
>gained.
>
>3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
>
>4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
>
>5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
>
>6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly
>answer the door in your nightgown.
>
>7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
>
>8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
>
>9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are
>run over by a steamroller.
>
>10. Balderdash (n), a rapidly receding hairline.
>
>11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
>
>12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by
>proctologists.
>
>13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
>
>14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
>
>15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that,
>when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
>
>16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by
>Jewish men.
>
>The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any
>Word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one
>letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:
>
>1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops
>bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows
>little sign of breaking down in the near future.
>
>2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of
>getting laid.
>
>3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the
>subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
>
>4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
>
>5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the
>person who doesn't get it.
>
>6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running
>late.
>
>7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
>
>8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra
>credit.)
>
>9 Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these
>really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's
>like, a serious bummer.
>
>10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day
>consuming only things that are good for you.
>
>11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
>
>12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
>when they come at you rapidly.
>
>13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after
>you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
>
>14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into
>your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast
>out.
>
>15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the
>fruit you're eating.
>
>And the pick of the literature:
>
>16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Dr Willard McCarty | Professor of Humanities Computing | Centre for
Computing in the Humanities | King's College London |
http://staff.cch.kcl.ac.uk/~wmccarty/. Et sic in infinitum (Fludd 1617, p. 26).
Received on Fri Sep 21 2007 - 03:15:51 EDT